I love BC but it is time? …. I love the mountains that stay snow capped long into the summer. I love the ocean and how everyday it provides new and awaiting adventure. I love the forests, dense and left wild, bringing new life with each season. I love the look, the smells and the simplicity it all brings. But is it enough?
For all that I love of BC I equally love about my family I miss them more then ever before, maybe it the painful loss of Maggie that opened up emotions of love that I had long since let go dormant that makes me long to with them. Maybe it is this stage of aging that brings awareness for the need to have roots, to have structure, to find a new purpose or to make a long-term plan for future existence.
I can see walking hand and hand with my parents as they age through their years. Maybe its this vision that drives the need for me to be with them. I can see playing with my nephews’ kids as their lives begin to take root. I can see BBQ’s and snow filled evenings with my brother and sister in law as we plan a possible new adventure. But is it enough?
What holds me here in this place of beauty is the draw of nature and how tangible it is every day. What draws me back home is where family and roots may be waiting.
Perhaps the next hour, the day, the next moment will bring clarity and allow my two possible worlds to become one.
Live Love Laugh,
Maggie & Me Good bye My Sweet Girl
Maggie & Me Good bye My Sweet Girl
The moment I brought Maggie home I knew my life was changed forever, I never could have imagined just how much.
My Beautiful Maggie was complicated and needed extra attention, but for all that I gave up to care for her I received back in endless love.
Maggie taught me how to have fun but not just fun to be down right silly. To be patient thoughtful, and reflective.
Maggie taught me to take notice of everything, not just the small stuff, but everything. How to catch a smell as a breeze came through, how to find the best blades of grass for eating, how to find joy in rainstorms and find shady spots during hot summer days.
She taught me to find stillness and to just be in the moment but then to get and go no matter how many times I may not have wanted to.
Maggie gave me unconditional love, she never judged me on my worst days, she accepted my faults and yes when it came to her took a bit of advantage of my weaknesses.
She was my companion in life and will be my angel in her passing.
For those that know me, you understand the unique bond I had with Maggie. I have lost my footing, the strength that she gave to keep me grounded, my identity as her Mommy, my best friend, my soul mate.
Remember Maggie for all that she was
- She was beautiful
- She loved to talk
- She was vocal about what she wanted, when she wanted it
- She loved to argue with her mommy
- She loved to love
- She loved her Auntie (Lorraine)
- She loved people (attention)
- She loved to cuddle
- She loved to sit on your lab
- She always had to be touching you
- She hogged the bed (always)
- She loved to lick off expensive face cream
- She loved all types of body lotion
- She loved her home cooked meals and treats
- She loved to eat the bubbles in the bath tub
- She loved the ocean
- She loved the beach and sand
- She loved the best pieces of grass
- She loved Horses and their Poop!
- She Loved the Forest
- She loved to walk and walk and walk
- She loved long car rides
- She loved Ice Cream
- She loved Cheezies
- She loved to carry her babies to the car every time we left the house
She loved me, run free now my sweet girl
With a broken heart leaking with love
One strong breeze and everything can change . The wind topples the top of a tree, with a loud bang and a snap it falls to the forest floor, where it will decay and provide food for all things in nature or it will become the nursing branch, from which news saplings will grow
One strong breeze can move clouds at amazing speed. Creating cloud formations that are joyous to watch and opening up spaces for the sun to shine through, changing a cloudy forecast to a sunny spring awakening
One strong breeze creates a playground for eagles to practice their soaring skills building strength for their powerful explosive hunting dives
One strong breeze can change a calm ocean into ripples and waves carrying in sea life for other sea creatures to have life. Washing up debris on to ocean shores, nature’s way to self clean itself from things no longer needed
One strong breeze changes so many things
Thank you for reading
Live Love Laugh
First rocks and now laundry…. Do you get a sense I have been in need for the simpler things in life?
The morning here is slightly overcast. The sun and the ocean marine layer are fighting with each other for space in the sky. For now the marine layer wins out and the winds toss around a fine mist so gentle you wonder if it is mist at all.
Saturday morning laundry is one of the chores we did as children and it was one of my favorite ones. I simply love laundry. I love the idea of the dirty clothes going in and then coming out with that clean smell (all natural lavender and rosemary soap of course). The aromatic smell of clean clothes awe…….
Today, just like when I was a child I get to hang my laundry outside. Back then, way back then I used to wait in anticipation for the washer to finish anxious to get the clothes on line. Today was that day, the one that took me back to those moments.
Try to imagine a breeze blowing off the ocean the shorebirds and seagulls calling out to one another, the winds rustling through the trees and me hanging sweet smelling laundry just like my mom taught me
I took my time hanging everything just right so that it would dry with that crisp outside feeling, wishing that I had more to wash, more to hang and more moments like this in my life.
I think if there is a heaven this moment, this feeling must be part of it,
Thank you for reading and being part of my journey